Saturday, September 24, 2011

Left or Right, Forward or Backwards, Stay or Go and other decisions

Somebody once told me that life is a collection of decisions that you make. Most of them are minor but sometimes we come across decisions that are so large that they define the direction we take our lives. In the last two weeks I witnessed the profound agony of having to make one of these large decisions and then I had to make one of my own. Two of my dearest friends here in Bulgaria decided that they had had enough of this place and resolved to return home to their old lives. Upon hearing the news of both of these decisions (each a week apart) I was shocked, then sad, and then I left jealous. Jealous because they would soon be returning to their old lives, to the old world, back to the way things were before they came to Bulgaria, a place I have thought a lot about lately. I started thinking about my life before I joined the Peace Corps, my friends, my family, and just how easy living was. Back to a place where I understood everything everybody said, a place where if I could eat more than one variety of food, and most of all a place where I could never feel as lonely as I do now.... But then I realized that the reasons I chose to join the Peace Corps and come to Bulgarian are far stronger than the sum of everything I left behind. I am resolved to no longer be at the mercy of nostalgia

4 comments:

  1. I love you both. I wish I could say nostalgia brought me back, but unfortunately other things were (and are) at work. It's something that will take a while to work through, but that's life. I'm so glad to hear that you're resolved to keep being strong and live a life full of adventure and service to others. Love and miss you!

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  2. Human emotions are rooted from the foundation of nostalgia...This perfect foundation of self awareness allows us to realize who we were and who we will become. Knowing who you are is only complete if you have the whole story.

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